More and more, Women are choosing not to have children whether it is career driven or not it is their personal choice however, that is NOT always the case. So many women want to have children and most of the time they start trying and that is when they find out something is just not right. I used to
get so SICK of that, “Well what are you waiting on”, “You know you are not
getting any younger”, “What is taking so long”, or my all time worst, “Ya’ll
been married about XX years and ya’ll still don’t have any kids. It took me a long time to really realize that
the so called normal question of, “do you have any children” was a part of
building relationships and friendships and that some people were just trying to
get to know me but deep down I was dealing with my own insecurities and had to
learn to NOT be offended by that one question.
Now the others often came from people who already knew me and honestly
it would drive me bonkers. And just like
any other women trying to conceive with health issues would do, I would grit my
teeth and say, “whenever God says so” or “whenever it happens” (while wearing a
fake smile and killing them softly with my eyes). 👀
Nonetheless, it was my own internal issues that I had to
overcome and overtime I did. I had to
learn that not everyone’s life journey will be the same and that is no one’s
fault. We have to play the hand in life
that we have been dealt, no matter good or bad. And that’s not to say that some people who
knew my situation weren’t mean or rude purposefully because that happened as
well. I have had comments made towards
me about expensive purchases and vacation travels because, we didn’t have
children and we could afford them. When honestly there is a thing called savings, travel agents and planning ahead. I was
even a part of a joke with the person making a statement about having a working
reproductive system opposed to mine. Well at this time, I was so in shock I didn't have a response but instead was offended to the high heavens and hurt beyond words. But
MOST of the time, people really truly cannot relate to your struggle and that
is okay, many times in life and with all situations you can share a story or
hear a story but until it’s you or someone you care deeply about that is
affected most of the time you cannot relate.
And not to say many people do not
have empathy, yes they do but they still cannot relate.
I did a search on the internet looking from some of the
worst comments a person can say to a women without children. Check them out below and feel free to view
some of the answers to these questions here and add some of your own in the
comments. Thank you!!
What a bad decision
Now that I have children, my life has true meaning
You’re a crazy cat lady in training
You think you’re tired?
You don’t know what tired is
You’re being selfish
You’ll change your mind when you meet the right man
What are you waiting for
Your mom had you
Your’re missing out on one of the best things in life
Tick Tock
It’s a mom thing
That’s a shame. You
might regret it
What’s wrong with you
The size of that house and just the two of you? It’s a waste of space
But you would be such a great mom
Just find a donor and have kids. I’ll babysit
You think you don’t want children, but once you have them
you’ll change your mind
Don’t wait too long
You’d better hurry up and give your husband a child before
he finds someone who will
You don’t have children, so you won’t understand
You don’t know what real love is
Wait until your biological clock kicks in
Aren’t you worried there’ll be no one to look after you when
you’re old
What will you do with yoru life
Are you even a woman
You don’t want them or can’t have them
No comments:
Post a Comment