Trying to Conceive

As a young girl, I used to dream about one day becoming a mother and I would always tell people that I wanted 4 children.  I would have 2 of my own and then adopt 2.  (Reality: 4 bonus children and 1 of my own but not to far off, I guess 😁). I have to admit, it was exciting planning my life as to how I thought it would be.  WHOMP-WHOMP!  Life happened and reality set it and I, like so many other women had to experience, stress, pain and heartbreak while trying to get pregnant.  For those of you who do not know, it takes the average young couple 4-6 months to conceive, with approximately 85-95% getting pregnant after one year of trying (Mcguinness, 2018).  Now add medical health issues and age to the mix and your chances of getting pregnant fast continue to decline.

But before you rush to go make an appointment with a fertility specialist there are a few things you can try to consider on your own.  And just like everyone else we went to the internet to start our searches.

For those trying to conceive you already know that sex can turn into planned intercourse that is not always fun.  You are checking a thermometer, watching the calendar and counting days and narrowing sex down to the very last second.  That is NO WAY fun and exciting but choosing certain types of lubricants can help enhance the experience and help you to enjoy each other.  BUT not any ol lubriance will do.  Those warming lubricants are probably a No-No and you want to be sure to find a lubricant that is sperm friendly such as Pre-Seed, somthing that will not harm or kill sperm.  Clinical studies show that Pre-Seed is a sperm-safe lubricant, which is a benefit over most lubricants (Try whatever you want, just listing this as a suggestion).  According to Mcguinness (2018),  Texas fertility specialist Jerald Goldstein, MD, states that vegetable oil is a safe and effective lubricant that has no effect on sperm.

Take a look at increasing or starting vitamin supplements.  I always took vitamins as a child so increasing my vitamin intake was not an issue for me.  Once again I went to the internet and did a search looking for vitamins that would be beneficial to couple's trying to conceive.   I was used to daily vitamins such as multivitamins and taking the hair, nail and skin pills (love the the gummies) but after searching the internet I also added Fish oil to my daily vitamins because of the omega-3, folic acid, vitamin B.  I did not take Zinc but according to multiple websites it is considered one of the most important minerals for conception and pregnancy (Mcguinness, 2018).  Sarah Yang lists 10 different vitamins that help with conception (click here) so I hope that you find these helpful.  On Sarah's list antioxidants are mentioned and if you  browsed through some of my other blog posts you will see that I did increase my antioxidants but only after my physician instructed me too.  However, I did not purchase or intake any supplements for antioxidants, instead I increased eating berries. Strawberries, blueberries, blackberries, cranberries and raspberries, anything with berries according to my physician.  But that was short lived for me so I went to my local Sam's Club and happen to stumble across,  Bai Antioxidant infusions (yes the funny commercial with Justin Timberlake).  These worked perfect for me so I began buying them by the case.  Now there are other alternatives to the drinks or supplements for antioxidants, Ryan Raman (2018) lists 12 healthy foods high in antioxidants.
1. Dark Chocolate
2. Pecans
3. Blueberries
4. Strawberries (ate lots of them in my salads)
5. Artichokes
6. Goji Berries
7. Raspberries
8. Kale (ate kale in smoothies & salads)
9. Red cabbage
10. Beans
11. Beets
12. Spinach (ate spinach in smoothies & salads)

Let me say that I am no physician and have never been to medical school.  My blog is simply sharing my story in hopes to inspire, encourage and motivate someone else to keep moving in their journey.  I say that to say my next suggestion is one of personal experience, Chinese Herbs.  While searching the internet I came across the site, Fertility Formulas (twitter page here).  I was given a free consultation and moved forward with purchasing some of the herbs.  Also for women with Endometriosis I would suggest looking into Chinese Herbs because they worked wonders for us!!! Pain I had suffered through for 2 decades was non-existent while taking these herbs.  SERIOUSLY!!! No pain.  Unfortunately for us we had other health issues by the time we reached this chapter in our story and required 2 additional surgeries before conceiving but I would personally recommend you looking into Chinese Herbs, researching it or even scheduling a consultation.


I'm sure there are other things that women are doing to get pregnant and would love to hear about them. Please add to the comments

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Geriatric Pregancy

I can still remember the day I knew I was pregnant.  It was Mother's day, May 2016 and my first sign was my sense of smell.  I was able to smell everything good and bad from a mile away.  I recall pressing my face against the window trying not to gag on the cheddar/sour cream chips he shoved into his mouth 😂. I felt it in my heart but still needed my doctor to confirm which was about a week later.  I had one of the biggest, ugliest silent cries that you would see on movies right before the big wail came flooding the TV speakers.  YES! YES! YES! YES! I was jumping for joy until that moment I was told, "because of your age alone, you will be considered HIGH RISK in your pregnancy.

I instantly had old emotions flood me all over again and questioned myself as to being too old to conceive, carry and deliver a healthy child.  Was 37 really considered a Geriatric Pregnancy?  Just saying it out loud sounded like I was super old.  My doctor did discuss all of the risks that could be associated with a geriatric pregnancy and although I we experienced some of the risks (1) premature birth and (2) high blood pressure (near the end of pregnancy) we delivered a healthy baby girl.👶

What are the risks of a geriatric pregnancy? <-Click link for more information

Because a woman has the same eggs that she is born with her entire life, there is a higher risk of abnormalities during pregnancies that happen later in life. According to BMC Pregnancy and Childbirth and the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, some of the risks of advanced maternal age during pregnancy include:

• premature birth
• low birth weight in the baby
• stillbirth
• chromosomal defects in the baby
• labor complications
• cesarean section
• high blood pressure in the mother, which can lead to a serious condition called preeclampsia, and an early birth for the baby
• gestational diabetes, which also increases the risk of diabetes later in life

Benefits of being a mature aged mother

It was not my choice to become a mother at the age of 38 but this is my reality.  I would be lying if I told you being a mature aged mother did not come with it's own set of challenges.  I have classmates that are enjoying grandparent hood and I am just now joining in on motherhood.  BUT the one thing that I tell myself is everybody's journey is not meant to be the same.  It took me a while to understand that and not be so self conscience about being a mature aged mom.  For a while, I would think, "when she is 10, I will be 48. And what will I do when she attends school and all the young mothers and classmates think I am her grandmother.  Or deal with the comments from family or friends saying, "it is about time" and "we were wondering what was taking so long".  But I had to shake these thoughts and focus more on the blessing of her existence and the true miracle that she is.

I am a huge reality TV fan and absolutely love that  women with a platform have become vocal on infertility struggles along with the many celebrities that have embraced "advanced maternal aged motherhood".  As an advanced maternal aged mother, some of the benefits I focused on was being in a stable marriage, complete my education, start a business, advance in my career and become financially stable.  But there are so many more benefits and I found them in an article written by 

Jessica Larsen, "15 Benefits of being being an older mom that you didn't think of".  

Please check out the article and enjoy.  I found quite a few that I really didn't think about.